Today I went to the zoo and a monkey threw poop at me. now weird things are happenin?

today i was at the jacksonville zoo in jacksonville and a monkey threw poop on me. my mom laughed and took pictures but in the 3 minutes it was on my face i felt a weird burning tingly sensation on my cheek where it was at. now i have a scab and it is green. it feels like its molting and i suddenly have the urge to eat bananas and reach into the toilet grab my poop and throw it at the wall. am i turning into a monkey boy???????? my lower back (wehre the end of the spine is at) started to hurt as if something was trying to come out of it. i think it's a tail but i cant kno for sure because i fell back on my butt when the monkey threw poop at me. help i dont wanna die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111